Have you ever wondered whether you truly know your own family’s secrets? Or maybe, you have secrets that you keep from your children and the rest of your family?

We all operate on autopilot at times, whether at work, at home, or in our relationships with our spouses and kids. Being together 24/7 for months has triggered survival mode in many of us, and autopilot is an easy default. I don’t know if absence really makes the heart grow fonder, but independence is essential for growth, and growth allows us to thrive.

With so many resources publicly available these days, including DNA testing, ancestry websites, and access to government record collections, we’re able to learn more about ourselves and our family’s history than ever before.

While there are many reasons we tend to surface-listen, the most common ones are that we’re not very interested in the conversation topic, we’re distracted by other things (our phones, our kids, and even hunger), or we’re short on time.

Lately, I've been doing a lot of thinking about values and what we value most in our family. Values are the foundation for what makes us who we are. Every family has them, whether you put emphasis on them or not.

In case you needed one, this is a reminder that we all have the ability to create a legacy, whether through greatness or with kindness, through years of service, or with one profound gesture or idea.

The holiday season was very different this past year. Many of us weren't able to visit with our families, attend church services, or even volunteer our time as we have in the past. This got me thinking about holiday traditions, what they mean to our families, and which ones are worth continuing or just forgetting about.

Before I dive in, let’s consider this... why is it that we (and by we, I mean the collective we) rarely take the time to sit down and talk to one another? For me, it's that I get bogged down by things I'm working on or feel I have to do, instead of just taking the time to connect with the people in my life. Does this ring true for you as well? Here are three ways to feel more connected to your grandparents, even if they're no longer with you.